[ title ]

Not sure what day it is, I haven't updated in over a week!

Christmas great. Really, really, really great. First great Christmas in a long time! It was so nice to see family I hadn't seen in a year and to get so many positive comments, which frankly, I was not expecting. I overate. Big surprise. Christmas Eve especially, I just could not get away from the sweet table. I paid the price the next day though...I felt cranky and definitely gained at least a pound for my weekly weigh-in. Christmas day was better and the rest of the week was too.

For some reason I was sick twice this week after eating. Both times it was beef and my pouch has always been somewhat sensitive to beef. 

That's all I can really type right now because I fell last night and broke my tailbone. What a way to ring in the new year! Oy. Seems like I'll be stuck in bed for the next couple of days at least. I have a lot to be thankful for though, so this should be good!

More updates in 2008, I promise!

Day 237

I would just like to start by thanking all of the readers of my blog for their enormous support over the past year. It has been quite the roller-coaster ride and I wouldn't have gotten through it without the comments and messages you all have left me! So best holiday wishes to you and yours :)

I have nothing to report so this is pretty much my plan for the next few days. 

The holidays need to be over because I am going a liiiiiittle bit crazy. Yesterday was my mom's birthday and we went out for szechwan. This restaurant we went to is famous for its peanut butter dumplings. Pre-op me + peanut butter dumplings = major love. I tried preparing myself mentally to only have a couple and hope that my family finished the rest. I ended up having 1 veggie spring roll, 4 dumplings (sounds bad, but 2 of them were very small), 1 piece of spare rib, a couple of forkfuls of cashew chicken, some string beans, and a forkful of these not-so-yummy noodles. Could have been worse. Stupid irresistible dumplings. 

This morning I came downstairs to a big box of banana chocolate muffins. I was going to have half for breakfast, with a yogurt...but then I checked the nutritional info box and saw that each muffin had 540 calories. I passed those up and had 1/2 a bagel instead. Lots o carbs? Yes, however, I still should be able to keep under 100g for the day.

Tonight is our big italian feast and that's going to go well because I'm going to stick to the lamb (because we're weird and don't do the seafood thing) and some soup. The desert part will suck, but I'd rather not suffer the consequences, so it should be easier to pass up.

Tomorrow, Christmas day, I'm not worried about either just because I'll be seeing a lot of family I haven't seen since last year, so I'll be spending the night talking about my surgery and stuff. Food won't be the main focus of these holidays like it was in the past. The part that I hate is coming home with leftovers and being bored at home for the days following Christmas. Oy.

So that is a preview of Loser's first Christmas! Once again, thank you all and I wish each one of you the best of holiday wishes! Recap to follow on Wednesday!

xoxoxoxo

Day 233

I hopped on the scale this morning and I am glad to say that things *seem* to have gotten back to normal. I'm eating better, feeling 1000x better and I cleaned my room last night, so I'm happy! I just got home from work not too long ago and I'm exhausted. Good thing about my work though is that they serve us our meals. Good thing it's a gym too because I get some really nice, healthy meals! First day was crustless quiche, then it was roast beef, then lemon grilled chicken, and tonight we had lean burgers with steamed veggies and salad! 

Breakfast - Yogurt, SFNF caramel latte

Lunch - 1/2 whole wheat pita, 1.5 slices bacon, 1 egg, feta cheese, lettuce, sauteed onions and peppers, 1/3 tblsp mayo. YUM

Supper - A little bit more than 1/2 beef patty, at absolute most 1/4 cup of rice, and some steamed veggies.

Snack - 3 meatballs, 1 SF cookie 

Not too shabby! Tomorrow is another day, one day closer to Loser's first Christmas! :)

Day 232

My first official day of doing nothing had turned into me cleaning my bedroom from top to bottom! I went out and bought clear plastic storage bins to store all my books and school papers and it's looking so much better already.

Even eating is going better today.

Breakfast - Protein Express bar, yogurt

Snack - Around 8-9 soy crisps

Late Lunch - 7 beef meatballs, 1 bocconcini, 1 tblsp parmesan, 1/4 cup marinara

Snack - 1 SF cookie (buying these was a big mistake I admit), 4 whole wheat melba toast, 1 tblsp FF peanut butter, 1 tblsp RS strawberry jam

As for tonight, I will probably have a latte, maybe another yogurt or some cheese. If I get really hungry, I'll have egg white with veggies.

I feel a lot better physically today too, eating like crap sure makes you feel like it.

Anyhoo, back to my cleaning!

Week 32?

I have been a terrible blogger in these past few weeks. I promise to be better now that school is DONE. Done, done, and done. Not only have I been a terrible blogger...but I've been an even worse eater! I had my first post-op gain this week, +0.5. I feel like crap about it. I'll need to work on stress eating a school next semester!

Other than that things are good. I've been getting ready for the holidays, can't believe Christmas is in just 1 week. What a crazy year 2007 has been! It only gets better, right?

Better update tomorrow, I'm exhausted!

Noideawhatdayitis

All I know is that I have my first final of the season in 8hrs and counting. AHHHHH!
Just taking a quick break from studying because I've spent 25 of the past 48 hours sitting in this freaking cubicle, I figured I deserved a break. This week needs to be done like 12hrs ago. I've been so hungry all the time this week too. I don't know if it's the stress or my pouch failing on me but it's been the hardest thing ever to control. I've been rushing back and fourth from home to the library so my food choices haven't been the greatest. Today for example, I've had 5 large coffees, about 1/2 ziploc bagful of cereal and raisins, 1/3 ziploc bagful of whole wheat vegetable crackers, 1 chocolate chip waffle, 1 chicken burger patty, 1 protein bar...and I have some more snacks which I'm sure I'll be needing before the night/day is done. School sucks balls.

Back to the books. Oh yeah...lost 1oz this week. Woo-freaking-hoo.

Day 217

Century club + 1! I won't be able to get the whole screen in next week unless I make my font a whole lot tinier!

Holy loss this week batman. I really hope (and I say this every week, ha!) that this is the start of my body doing what it is suppose to be doing again because I was getting pretty frustrated!

I am a happy loser this week folks!

Day 216 -100!

It was a weekend of milestones in Loserland! First of all, my scale had been acting weird all week so I hadn't weighed myself at all until yesterday. I had been stuck between 175 and 177 for what seemed like an eternity...and with finals just around the corner, I thought I could use a break from the scale for a couple of weeks. Yesterday afternoon I was telling my dad about how the scale was acting weird, so I jumped on and not only was it working (argh) but it marked 173.7. I was FLOORED. For me BMI to be considered overweight (as opposed to obese) I needed to get under 174 and I made it! For the first time in my life, I am no longer obese. I laughed, I cried, I jumped up and freaking down.
Aaaand this morning when I hopped on the scale, I was at 172.8. EXACTLY 100 lbs below my starting weight back in April. I have lost 100 pounds. I can't even wrap my mind around it. This is just the push to get me going again.
Last but not least, I got a new job on Friday! I really wasn't happy doing retail anymore, just wasn't my thing so I had been applying at a few places here and there, not really thinking anything. I got a call back on Thursday for a receptionist position at this private/exclusive squash club downtown. Very fancy shmancy. I didn't think I would get it because it isn't like I'm the model of perfect help. Who ever thought I of all people could get a job at a gym? Well I did get it! I start on Thursday. I'm so excited, I get a free membership at their sister club too!

All that excitement and I must start studying for finals!

Day 212

Day 212 in Loserland. Yesterday had a rough ending. I ate cookies. 4 of them. I felt like shit, but that's what I deserved I guess! I don't even know what came over me. It was my first binge I guess I would call it because I just shoved them in me before my brain could react.
Today is going better - not great, better. I can't wait to finish school though, argh! My scale is broken so no weighing myself for a few more days, not that I would want to weigh myself right now haha...

Anyhoo, here's what I ate today:

Breakfast - Detour bar
Snack - SFNF Pumpkin latte
Lunch - 1 egg salad sandwich on whole wheat
Snack - 1/2 cup SFFF pistachio pudding, 1 tblsp. chocolate chips
Supper - 1 breaded chicken breast
Snack - 1 cookie, SFNF pumpkin latte

Too much food and I'm going to try and not eat anything tonight...but worse comes to worse I'll stay away from the cookies and have some SF pudding instead.

Day 211

Well it's day 211. Day 210 did not end too well. A lot of mindless eating late at night while doing homework. In my pre-op life, homework and exams were just an excuse to overeat. The frosh 15 actually made me happy because if I gained a bit of weight, I could just blame it on school. Of course my frosh 15 was more of a frosh 55. Last night I ate so much bread...I realized what I was doing but man, why?! It's frustrating this food addiction I have.

Breakfast - 3/4 detour bar
Snack - SFNF pumpkin latte
Lunch - Chicken breast with gravy and some french fries (I felt like shit after)
Supper - 1 beef eggroll, some more french fries
Snack - SFFF pistachio pudding with 1/2 scoop vanilla protein powder

I'm pms'ing and craving starches like there's no tomorrow. I need to cut them out. Tomorrow's a new day!

Day 210

She's aliiiiiive! Yes, I am in fact alive. The semester is done this week so I've been really busy with last minute assignments and projects. These next 2 weeks will be even worse as I begin finals. I'm not too worried because I've done awesome this semester!
I decided that I need to start journalling again. I kind of gave up after a couple of weeks of writing everything down and seeing no results but back to basics for me! I did finally get a decent loss this week (week 30, -1.6) but I was finding myself reverting back to some old ways. Eating more bread, eating faster, eating sweets. In my mind I was eating in 'moderation' but eating wayyy too often throughout the day.
I splurged on True Religion jeans last week. Freaking size 32. And they've already stretched a bit too. I couldn't believe that I could actually tie them up and not have a bulging belly! I've lived in them since last Thursday. Best feeling in the world I tell ya.

Anyhoo...here's the scoop:

Breakfast - Detour bar
Snack - 1/2 doughnut, 1 SFNF pumpkin latte
Lunch - Stouffer's grilled herb chicken and veggies
Supper - Not sure yet
Snack - Not sure yet

My week 30 loss brings me to a total of 97.2 lbs down! So close to century club I can smell it!

Day 201

I suck at updating this month, wow! There really hasn't been a whole lot going on to be honest. Eating is going good. I eat everything in moderation. This afternoon we went to a cake restaurant. A FREAKING CAKE RESTAURANT. I was so hungry too, not the time of day to walk into a restaurant full of cakes. I managed though, and it wasn't the traumatic event it would have been if I hadn't had this surgery. Life is good right now, I have nothing to complain about!
I'm seeing a boy, although nothing is official yet. I definitely see more of a future with him than with the last guy I was seeing. It's crazy the attention I get differently now, I'm still enjoying it but can see it become annoying some day!
School semester ends in 2 weeks...then onto finals and then it's Christmas! I'm so relieved that the semester is over. It kind of sucks though because I am just so sick of studying that I've almost given up...I've really slacked off in the past couple of weeks.

That's really the update I have. Lame bit much?

:)

Day 196

I feel like I haven't updated in ages. There isn't too much going on, I'm seeing yet another boy, since the last one didn't work out. I'm 20 and I've never dated like I am now. It's very strange!
I have been really, really busy but eating is going well. As usual, the scale didn't budge until yesterday. Last week I weighed in at 180.3, on Thursday I was 182, and then Sunday I don't remember exactly what I was, but it was still above last Tuesday's official weigh-in. This morning I hopped on the scale and *poof* 177.4. What the crap?
It's a huge loss for me -2.9 and hopefully it's the beginning of some more nice big losses. Maybe I'll even reach my goal by Christmas!

That's it for today, the weather is gorgeous and I'm working in a couple of hours :(

Day 191

My life, in point form:

• Got size 10 jeans from Gap today. There's a long story to this, but I will have to wait until tomorrow to elaborate.
• Eating is going super but the scale isn't freaking budging, so no more scale hopping until Sunday the earliest.
• My doctor told me my dizzy/fainting spells are caused by dehydration so more water for me!

That's pretty much it. I have 2 assignments due tomorrow morning, but I work at 9 so I have no idea how to attempt this and manage to get some sleep.

Day 189

I've been a bad blogger! I'm doing great though, just busy with school and work. The semester ends in just a few weeks, crazy!

Today was my week 27 weigh-in and despite a gain on Sunday morning, I did manage to lose 1.2lb this week, bringing my total to 92.5lbs. Today and yesterday have been really good. I'm running out of AchievOne though...no idea what I'll do once those are gone, they've been my staple every morning!

Breakfast - AchievOne, cheese stick
Snack - NF SF hazelnut latte, detour bar
Lunch - 1/2 cup tomato veggie soup, 1/2 a bagel
Supper - Broccoli stuffed chicken
Snack - SF hot chocolate (I haven't had this yet, and don't think I will, I'm full)

839 calories, 25g of fat, 77g carbs, 74g protein including the hot chocolate which I won't be having.

Yay for me!

Day 186

Long time no update. I haven't had a good eating week at all. I've let my hormones get the best of me and haven't used the willpower I should have. I'm feeling pretty crappy and don't know how to snap out of it!

I found this picture on my computer tonight. It was taken in Cuba one of the first times I went in early 2006. It shocks me to see old pictures like this. I hardly recognize myself!

I'm eating (of course) it's just one of those pictures, I can't help but wonder, how did I ever think I could be happy weighing as much as I did?

It also makes me feel like I have such an amazing tool to use, and I'm taking it for granted.

I'm sleepy, weepy, and blah. Better update to come tomorrow.

Day 183: Happy Halloween!

Halloween. The one day of the year in which it's ok to eat mounds and mounds of chocolate. Or at least it was. I used to look so forward to having all this candy in the house. We'd always eat it all a week before Halloween and end up having to buy more. This year I think my mom did me a favour in not buying any until this afternoon. Would it have been a problem? Maybe, not like other years, but it was a relief to not have to worry about the temptation.

Here's what I've eaten today so far:

Breakfast - AchievOne, 2 melba toast with PB, 4 soy crisps

Snack - 7 jelly beans. Best darn jelly beans I've ever had!

Lunch - Nothing (breakfast was late so I didn't go hungry)

Supper - Whole wheat thin crust spinach and chicken pizza

Snack - I know I can't avoid the candy all night so I'm anticipating having a couple of treats.

Very reasonable if you ask me! I'm going to the gym in a couple of hours. I'm gonna play squash :)

Day 182

It's late, I'm sleepy so this is gonna be quick.

Breakfast - AchievOne
Snack - NF SF hazelnut latte
Lunch - Whole wheat toast with PB
Snack - Spy crisps
Supper - Broccoli & cheese stuffed chicken breast

Totals: 671 calories, 23g of fat, 62g carbs, 54g of protein.

So-so eating day today, haven't really been in the mood to eat. I finally got my AchievOne protein drinks (mocha java) and it tastes okay, I'll need to order the cappuccino next time. Stupid UPS broke 3 of my bottles.

Today was also week 26 weigh-in day and to my surprise...I lost 2 lbs! I was the same or more up until this weekend when I decided that I was getting too hard on myself. I'm hoping to see the 170's next weekend.

I booked my plane ticket to FL tonight...I leave Valentine's day for 9 days. That'll be a nice break.

Anyhoo, I'm off to bed!

Day 180

I have pictures! It's too bad I didn't have my camera at the restaurant or at the church, I would have gotten much better ones.




The supper was fun, nice italian restaurant. Everyone kept saying how different I looked since last time I saw most of these relatives was in August. The outfit came together pretty nicely. My shoes are too big at the back. I NEVER was able to wear these for as long as I did today in my "previous" life. Pretty random!
Supper was good, had veal parmesan with a side of spaghetti. I had maybe 3 or 4oz of the veal and a couple of bites of the spaghetti. It was so good, and I forgot the rest of it at the restaurant! Stupid me. I even had some desert. They came out with a chocolate cake, I had a couple of bites, put down my fork...pushed the plate away and before I knew it I had taken a couple more. I had the piece with the least amount of icing so I can see why I didn't dump. But man do I wish I had!

Anyhoo, I have some catching up to do. Where has the weekend gone?

Day 178

It is day 178 and I am exhausted! I started work officially a couple of days ago, I actually start up again in 7 1/2 hours.
Things have been good. I have been doing stupid things though, aka voluntarily sabotaging my eating. Like late yesterday I wanted some soy crisps. I usually count out 14-15 into a bowl and put the bag away. Last night I was lazy and sleepy and just wanted soy chips. I knew that I would eat more than I should and I knew I wouldn't be able to stop *all of this internal dialogue of course* but I still brought the bag with me and munched away. Same thing happened this morning with a waffle. I saw a nice plate of waffles my mom had made and knew that I shouldn't have it. All those carbs, and the thickness you'd think would give me foamies. But nope. I grabbed one. I ate about 3/4 of it. But WHY?

Aside from that I bought the nicest dress today! I'm going to a baptism on Sunday and realized that I have nothing to wear. This dress looks amazing on. My jaw dropped in the dressing room. It's a size 12, nice cashmere-type turtleneck. I can't wait to wear it!

That's pretty much it for Friday's news :)

Day 176

Not too much to say tonight. Things are well!

Breakfast - SF instant breakfast
Snack - 14 soy crisps
Lunch - 3/4 cup oh leftover shepard's pie, 1 tblsp HP sauce
Supper - Caprese salad, 3oz grilled breaded pork, 1 tblsp marinara, 3 mini bocconcini balls
Snack - Maybe a SF NF latte later tonight, or a protein ball, or some more soy crisps, unlikely though.

Water - Way better than yesterday, but I doubt I'll get more than 1.5L in
Exercise - Sadly. No.

Tra la la la!

Day 175

Week 25 in Loservilled Stats:


Not too shabby, I am back on track as of Sunday...I need to get to these 170's. I haven't weighed 170 since the 6th grade!!!

Breakfast - Protein balls (I think I'm sick of them, they're getting hard to finish)
Snack - SF NF vanilla latte
Lunch - 1/2 chicken & pesto panini, on whole wheat bread
Snack - Soy crisps, probably anywhere between 25-30, I lost count
Supper - About 3/4 cup of shepard's pie. My mom decided not to drain the fat, so it was gross.

Back to studying for tomorrow's mid-term!

Day 174

I am soooo glad today is over and done with! This afternoon I had my stats mid-term. This is the one I've been dreading the entire time and I am glad to report that I aced it! I can't wait to get this grade back. Two down, two to go. The last 2 should be a breeze though.
I did eat better today. I was a lot calmer which made a huge difference I think. I made some protein balls last night to get me through this week. I also went a did a bit of grocery shopping this afternoon. I loaded up on soy crisps and stuff to make salads. I need to get back on track. It's not that I've been eating badly per se, I just haven't been eating. Starbucks SF NF latte does not a meal make!

Breakfast - 1/2 a protein ball
Lunch - 1/2 whole wheat chicken pesto panini
Snack - 3 soy crisps
Supper - Broccoli & cheese stuffed chicken breast, 1/4 cup mashed potatoes
Snack - Either a protein ball or some soy crisps

These new protein balls I made with low-fat peanut butter, so 5g of fat, instead of 9g.

Day 171

Oh do I have stories to share! It's really late though, and I have work early in the morning but I'll post this anyways.
A couple of friends and I had a girls night out tonight. We decided on dinner and a movie. Fun, right? So we get to the restaurant (after getting SOAKED just walking from the car) and instead of ordering big meals, we would just order 3 appetizers and split them (they had a special, 3 appetizers for $21). While we were waiting for that to come, we bumped into a friend who happened to be a waitress. She was very sweet and got us some drinks (diet coke for me, I took maximum 3 tiny sips) and some cream of broccoli soup. I figure it was soup, so it wouldn't fill me up too much, and I hadn't really eaten anything hearty all week so a little soup couldn't hurt! WRONG. I had about a 1/4 cup and started feeling really tired all of the sudden. Almost like I had to put my head down. It didn't help of course that the restaurant was loud and crowded. plus it was hot because of the humidity outside. I told my friends that I wasn't feeling so good, but after 10-15 minutes I really had to get away to calm myself down. My heart wasn't pounding like it did the couple of other times...I just felt so tired, weak, almost faint. I went to the bathroom and just sat down on the bench and did some breathing, splashed some water on my face. It took a good 10 minutes before I could go back to the table. I still felt a little off, but within 20 minutes of that, I was a different person. I felt so much better. It was strange, but that's dumping. No more soup for me!

Aside from that I start work tomorrow, then I babysit. And Sunday is another library day. I spent 3 hours there today but didn't get that much done. Next mid-term is Monday, and then Wednesday, and then Thursday. I need sleep now...

Day 169

Same story, different day. Another crazy day of cramming at the library. Today, by 8:30pm all I had eaten was 1/2 an apple and a granola bar! I was dying for a coffee but I was all out of change. Tomorrow should be better, my mid-term ends at 11:30 and then I have a break to study and maybe even have a decent meal!
I knew when I signed up for this surgery that school would be my biggest obstacle, and alas it is. It doesn't help that I have don't really have anything compact that I can take with me in the morning. And I'm broke and I hate buying fast food, plus I can't eat in the library.

Heeeelp!

Day 168

Now week 24 in Loserland and this will be yet another quick entry. *Pleasemidtermsbeoversoon* I am losing my mind. My eating is all over the place. I eat when I have the chance to, which is like in the car on the way to or from school. 9 days to go.

On a good note - I lost 4.1 lbs this week! YAYAYAYAYAY!!!!!!!!!!! After losing 0.8 lb last week, I was freakin' determined to do good this week. It really paid off. Now 10lbs away from being 'overweight' and 14.7 lbs away from my personal goal of 170. I'm sure I will continue losing, at least until my BMI is in the healthy range, but if I can maintain up to 170, I'll be the happiest person for the rest of my life.

Must get back to working...I'm falling asleep. Wait, sleep? What's that?

Day 167

Another quickie here tonight. Must. Get. Back. To. Writing. Paper.

(bad eating day)
B - 1/2 protein ball, yogurt
Sn - NF cafe latte
L - Nothing really
Su - 1 meat egg roll, 1 bite of a chicken tender, 6 french fries, 3 fork fulls of slaw salad.

Horrible! I may eat again before I sleep but I don't know what I feel like. I also didn't run tonight because there are simply not enough hours in a day for school and fitness it seems.

Tomorrow is another [weigh-in] day!

Day 166

I don't have much to say today, it's been a pretty boring one. I haven't had much of an appetite at all and I haven't been drinking my water. Blah!

I don't even think I can separate today's food total into meals: protein ball this morning, then a SF mocha thing with hazelnut, then a bit of lasagna and chicken alfredo (1 cup TOPS of both together). That's pretty much it, I feel really hungry now so I may go and grab something in a bit. I've just been pre-occupied all day, no time/desire to eat.

That's it for today!

Day 165: Procrastination

I'm at the library and this has been the most unproductive library trip ever. I've had to make a to-do list just to get me through these next 2 weeks of school. Stupid mid-term time.

I had quite the wow-moment this morning. I had an appointment with the nurse for my B12 injection and as the nurse was looking over my chart, her jaw dropped. She turned to me and said "You had gastric bypass surgery!?" And I nodded, she asked me how much I had lost and I told her 85 lbs. I thought she was going to fall off her chair, she then said "You were 85 lbs heavier? I never would have guessed it. You look so normal!". NORMAL? ME? It's funny because my best friend was telling me last night that she doesn't even think of me as overweight anymore. Of course I didn't believe her, but 2 people in 12 hours have called me "normal" looking. I've always been fat, how can that be?

Also, I spoke to my dad last night about me needing cold weather clothes because I've got nothing and he said to get what I needed and he'd chip in if I needed it. I'm going to need some sort of a fall jacket and a winter coat which is stressing me out because I'm in between sizes right now. Not quite a 12, but a 14 is just too big.

Food for the day - I haven't eaten yet today, so that will TBD.

Day 164

I do not even know how/why I am still awake. I ended up pulling an all-nighter last night, and after speeding downtown to school to hand in my assignment, I just sleep on and off all day long. How's that for productive? I was also having a hungry day. Probably caused by boredom. And when I feel like this, I seem to shut down, lock myself in my room and avoid the kitchen at all costs. I hate grazing and that's a big thing for me. I did pretty well though:

Breakfast - Protein ball
Lunch - Stouffer's rigatoni, 1oz cheese
Snack - Protein ball
Supper - 2 meat egg rolls
Snack - SF, NF vanilla latte

Totals - 950 calories, 38g of fat, 103 carbs, & 50g of protein. Meh.

Tomorrow I'm waking up, getting my B12 shot, heading to the library (shoot me plz!) and then going on my last run for week #1 of this C25K program. Good night!

Day 163!

Finally a picture of my masterpiece! They look like meatballs and taste like the best cookie dough ever. I need to cut back on them a touch, I've had 3 today, and sure they aren't all that unhealthy, but they represent almost half of all that I've consumed today.

I just finished another fantastic run. It was harder tonight but so rewarding. I went on afterwards for a bit even. I'm near dead now, but man am I proud :)

That's all I have to post today, I've been avoiding my assignment like the plague and reeeeeally need to get a move on it.

I have been logging all my food on fitday, I just haven't posted it here in a while:

Breakfast - Protein ball

Snack - Starbucks SF, NF hazelnut latte

Lunch - Cordon bleu chicken

Snack - Protein ball

Supper - Corn on the cob, and you guessed it...another protein ball (after my work-out)

Water - Excellent

Exercise - Fantabulous

Totals for the day - 942 calories, 44g of fat (yikes, I blame the PB), 78 carbs, and 63g of protein.

Day 162!

First things first, I completed my first C25K run last night!!!!!!! It was really hard, especially that last 60 second run. I can't wait until tomorrow. I woke up this morning and had a bit of pain in my groin area, hopefully it won't be so bad tomorrow. It isn't even funny how I would have collapsed 6 months ago doing what I did last night.

Eating is going well again today. I figured out that my protein balls have 163 calories, 9g of fat, 11g carbs, 11g of protein. Kind of more fat/calories than I expected. I've had 3 today, they're so good! I also had some thin crust/whole wheat pizza for supper, and then for snacks I had the rest of my soy crisps. I'm definitely going to need to buy some more of those too, they were so yummy.

That's all for tonight :)

Day 161

Week 23 here in Loserland...and I only lost 0.8 lbs this week :( I was at 187 (as opposed to 188.8 this morning) earlier this week, and here I was thinking I had had a really good past few days. Hopefully I can keep it up and boost these loses. 0.8lbs kinda sucks if I want to make it to my goal by the end of the year.

Breakfast - Protein ball, I must admit, it was too sweet to eat in one shot
Snack - Starbucks SF, NF, hazelnut latte
Lunch - 1/4 cup lentil soup, greek salad, 3oz feta cheese, 2 french fries
Supper - Cordon bleu chicken, 1/2 corn on the cob.
Snack - I think I'll have some soy crisps later tonight, maybe a protein ball

That's all for today!

Day 161

I had a fantastic food day. I need to review a product today because I am soooo in love with these it is not even funny. Genisoy soy crisps. I picked them up last night and gave them a try today. They are full of protein (well, 11g per 28 chips, so I can have 14 twice a day, good deal if you ask me), low in fat, carbs, and high in fiber. They smell really weird though so I was hesitant to try them, but wow! I can't wait to try the other flavours.

Aside from these, I made some french toast for breakfast. I had a slice and it was so good, I topped mine with some splenda, extra cinnamon, and of course SF syrup. I then spent hours in the kitchen making tomato sauce and then braising my lovely pork chops inside. This was so good, I wish I had taken a picture. And then tonight I decided I was craving something sweet, so I searched the web for some protein ball recipes. I hate protein powder and kind of dislike peanut butter, but I will try anything loaded with 10g of protein per tiny serving these days. I came across this site and found a protein ball recipe I could try out. I ended up combining elements from a bunch of recipes and got my lovely balls of protein. They are very sweet, but I think I can handle it. I just put them in he fridge and these and definitely things I can use if I need a protein boost/sweet snack. ***I do have a picture of my final product but blogger is being weird***

That's all for tonight...tomorrow is weigh-in Tuesday!

Day 159

Oh so sleey. I had another full day of training and rushing home to chauffeur my brothers between friend's houses and hockey practice. I can't wait to not do anything tomorrow, Thanksgiving Monday.

I had a really good eating today. I nearly got sick at supper though, my grandmother had us over and I ate really well, much more than I thought I would. What nearly killed me was the cookied I decided to have once I was DONE eating.

Here's what I ate:

Breakfast - Tea. I brought a protein bar to eat in the car but it was gross.
Lunch - A little less than 1/2 a small chicken teryaki sandwich at Subway, whole wheat bread, cheddar cheese, veggies. I had the chicken and cheese in the other half once I got home from work (no bread).
Snack - 14 soy crisps chips (found these tonight, they're excellent! 11g of protein per 28 crackers).
Supper - Lean pork tenderloin (4oz, who knew! It was so moist, very lean), couple of carrot pieces and broccoli florets, and some salad with SF dressing. I felt full and instead of going for the individual chocolate mudslide cakes my grandmother made, hot out of the oven may I add, I had just a chocolate cookie...the one that my pouch just was too full for.

Goodnight!

Day 158

First things first, my date last night. Now we had gone out a couple of times, just for coffee and to talk...all the getting to know each other stuff. We had also been talking on the phone A LOT over the past few days. He's very nice and most of the time we had great conversation, but I don't think I'm what he's looking for right now. I definitely am not ready (especially now that I have such a new perspective on life since my surgery) to settle down at all. I'm not sure if I had mentioned that we had quite a few years age difference, hence the much more serious talks last night. I'm really not sure what's next. I suck at this type of stuff!

Besides that I had to be up by 7 to drive my parents to the airport, and then went to my new job training. Round 2 of this training is tomorrow all day. Ouf! And then I take my brothers to my grandmothers for yet another Thanksgiving dinner.

Food-wise I'm doing okay today, I need to go grocery shopping at some point before Tuesday and I have sooo much homework to do.

More tomorrow!

Day 156

Another quick update this evening. I hate homework! I've had a really, really happy past couple of days. I met a boy, his name is Claudio and I really, really like him! We've had a couple of unofficial "getting to know each other" dates, but tomorrow night is the big official fancy schmany dinner date. This is a huge thing for me because other than the one boyfriend I've had, I've never really dated like other girls my age. We're taking it slow and I'll see where this takes me!
In other news, I went gym hunting today, sort of. I knew of a gym near my school which I had been avoiding because I didn't think it was worth seeing. It seemed small and I knew it had been around for a long time which mean old equipment etc. Well I went to see it today and was completely blown again! It takes up the entire floor upstairs and every cardio machine has its own satelite tv, the classes seem very interesting, and it was huge! I got a good vibe and it's definitely a contender. Plus, with my student discount, it's almost half price from the regular membership. Also, I can go to the location near my house since I'm not downtown at school every day.

I should really get going, here's what I ate:

B - Nothing
Snack - Medium SF vanilla NF latte
L - 3oz chicken, a few french fries, a few sips diet coke
S - Probably leftover chicken, cheese
Snack - I may have a latte tonight

Goodnight!

Day 155

Hockey's back! Yay! Here is my WL chart with this morning's updated weight. Goodbye 190's, hello 180's. I am so close to my goal it's crazy, I could not be any happier!

Big loss this week, but that's only because I was sick and doing nothing but keeping somewhat hydrated. Eating today has been tough for some reason. I just haven't had the time or the apetite for food.

B - 1/3 south beach diet protein bar
L - 1/2 small slice of chicken pizza on whole wheat crust
Snack - Kit-Kat single bar
S - Not sure yet, I'm really not that hungry.

Water - Good, good!

Anyhoo, back to the game!

Thought I'd share these...

April 2007
The night before my surgery I realized that I hadn't taken formal full-body pictures...so I took these in the bathroom mirror.


And then tonight, 5mos and 1 day later in the same outfit.


Those jeans were my favourite...they are size 22, and the shirt is men's size XL.

PS. Ignore the mess in the background :)

Day 154

Week 22 begins! I was up almost all night last night and woke up late, so no morning run AND I forgot to weigh-in. What are the chances of that? I will weigh-in tomorrow and hopefully get that running thing started tonight. If I don't fall asleep in my books that is.

I gotta head to the library now...oh the joys of being a student!

B - Piece of cheese
L - Fruit salad (no juice/sugar) and part of a spicy chicken wrap (maybe 1/5 of a full wrap). It was wayyy too spicy for my liking.
Snack - Maybe more of the wrap, or a SF rice pudding
S - No idea yet, maybe the wrap.

Boring day today, eating wise. I just have no time for food it seems!

Day 153

Happy 5 month sergiversary to me! Can't believe it's been 5 months. This is going to be fast because I have yet another essay to write and lots of studying to do before I let myself go to bed. Plus I just had a protein bar and I feel crappy now.

Food today:
B - Nothing
L - 1/2 white bun with LF garlic and chives cream cheese
Snack - 1 piece of cheese
S - 1 slice (actually, 3/4) of whole wheat bread, 1 egg, 1 tblsp mayonnaire
Snack - South beach peanut butter protein bar (yuck!)

Water - Meh, could be wayyy better.
Exercise - I'm going to try and wake up 45mins earlier tomorrow morning and run. Big words...but I'm going to try!

Day 152: Pouch's first Thanksgiving

It may seem crazy, but Canadian Thanksgiving is next week! Since my parents are going on vacation, my dad's side of the family got together tonight. I loooooooove Thanksgiving food. Best food ever, right? I knew I'd face some sort of food dilemma...but I am happy to say that I did pretty darn good!

I had a small slice of turkey, a couple of bites of stuffing, a couple of bites of mashed potatoes, a baby carrot (or two), an asparagus, and some of my grandmother's famous broccoli casserole. I took my time eating it because I wanted to enjoy every bite. It seems like a lot of food, but alas it wasn't! I didn't over eat or feel like I was ready to die after dinner, I was very comfortable and satisfied. Very different from other Thanksgiving dinners. After dinner my grandmother took out the 4 (YES, 4, F-O-U-R) pies she had baked for the 8 of us. Now I wasn't anticipating having desert and I was full, no need to eat. I waited maybe 20 or 25 minutes and then decided to have a bit of fruit salad and 2 bites of apple crisp. Definitely worth every bite. Of course here we are 3 hours later, almost 11pm and I feel like my pouch is begging for food. Weird how it works sometimes.

Also, I bought a new iPod today since they were on sale and I desperately need music to work out. I'm hoping to start this "Couch to 5k" podcast this week. I don't have/can't afford the superstar running shoes I need right now, but it'll have to do! This week I also need to start checking out some gyms...or hope to at least.

That's it for tonight, happy Thanksgiving!

Day 150

Warning: This is one of those "talking to myself" entries and completely boring and pointless.

Bah! Nothing really to update. I'm feeling better than yesterday, just a stuffy nose and a headache. I felt so lazy today...I did not like it one bit! I don't have class on Fridays and haven't started the job I sort of got yet, so I've basically been sitting at home doing nothing. Not eating or drinking very much in the past couple of days, I barely had energy to get up and do dishes.
Eating today was atrocious. My mom made the evil banana-chocolate muffins. I should really figure out how bad they actually are. They're low in fat, low in sugar, but probably loaded with carbs. I only eat 1 at a time, but they really add up at the end of the day. When there's nothing to eat in the house (like now) I just can't stay on track. I need choices! Grocery shopping after being unemployed for a month, after going on 2 mini-vacations within a month of each other = impossible. Hopefully the weekend goes better.

Day 149

After 2 1/2 days of miserableness, I'm alive! Yesterday was brutal, I thought my brain was going to explode out of my head, I had a horrible cough, nose was running like crazy, I was sick twice, my ears hurt...and the hot flashes, oh the hot flashes! I almost went to the hospital because I was having trouble breathing and had to use my puffer 4 times. And this was after not using it in over a year.
Anywhoo, I had 0 appetite yesterday and the 1 thing I did eat made me sick. I did have a bit of soup last night which stayed down. Today so far I've had 1 small waffle with SF syrup, 3/4 cup whole wheat penne with tomato sauce, and 1 SF hot chocolate/mocha.

I have a big assignment due tomorrow and it's the return of Grey's tonight so that's what I'll be doing this evening.

Day 147

Urgh...I woke up feeling like crap. Sore throat, fever, runny nose, pulsating sinuses. I went to school anyways, not sure why. I'm gonna load up on the nyquil and hope for the best because I don't feel like heading back out and I need some relief!

Breakfast - Rasberry yogurt
Snack - Venti SF vanilla latte, stupid starbucks ran out of skim milk...but I ordered a grande and got a venti, woohoo!
Lunch - 1/2 to 3/4 cup whole wheat fusilli, 2 tblsp. pesto, 1oz feta cheese
Snack - South Beach diet 100 calorie bars (chocolate & peanut)
Supper - Maybe whip up a soup or something

Good night!

Day 146

Home sweet home! I'm home after a crazy weekend in Toronto. It was a looong drive on Friday morning and a looooong drive last night but we made it.
Eating on vacation once again was good. I brought a couple of snacks for the drive on Friday and had some leftover pizza. The friends we stayed with took us to Swiss Chalet for supper. I ended up having a veggie burger with a baked potato. I was starving but I guess I ate too fast because I had a bit of foamies and gave it up pretty quickly. I only had 1/2 the patty and a bite or 2 of the potato.
Saturday - Cereal for breakfast. Just over 1/2 a cup, it made me dump a bit which sucked. We went downtown for the day and had lunch in the CN tower. I had a beautiful Caprese salad with pesto. YUM. Then I had some fruit for supper...followed by a cocktail, or two.
Sunday - 1/2 an egg for breakfast, 1/2 whole wheat toast. 3 chicken nuggets for lunch, a few french fries. Then 3/4 of a bbq rib subway sub, on whole wheat bread.

So that was my super exciting weekend...back to reality today. It was hard to get back into the swing of things and the homework I have this week is scary so here this goes:

B - Cafe latte
L - 1 cup lettuce, 1.5oz feta cheese, 3 tblsp. sugar-free dijon dressing
S - No idea yet, maybe some whole wheat pasta with pesto

I need to add a snack or something in there, my day is looking empty.

Day 142

In the words of Rachael Ray, YUMM-O!

I found these whole wheat thin pizza crusts in the supermarket today and decided to give them a try. I thought they were worth a try. I was going to try a meat crust pizza tonight, but opted for this whole wheat version! I added some olive oil, garlic, salt and pepper to the crust, and then on top of that: 1 cup of arugula, 1 1/2 roma tomatoes, 2oz extra-lean ground beef, 1 slice of bacon, and some cubed feta cheese. Delicious! I only had a 1/4 of it, but at least I can take some for the car ride tomorrow.

In other news, I finally got a job today. It isn't exactly what I wanted but I was getting desperate. I'll see how it goes, but I'll probably continue my hunt. Ok, now for the important stuff:

Breakfast - 1/2 banana, 2 mini chocolate-banana muffins

Lunch - Grilled chicken patty, 1 tblsp cesaer dressing

Snack - 1 mini chocolate-banana muffin

Supper - 1/4 slice of my pizza

Late night snack - I know I'll be hungry later tonight, I may go for yogurt or cereal.

The good - I'm doing good on water today! I bought a few groceries to get me through next week which will be great.

The bad - Stupid mini choco-banana muffins! My mom makes them every so often and they are so, so good. They are low in fat, but not a good choice.

I went for another great walk last night, not sure about tonight since I have some packing to do. I leave for Toronto tomorrow morning, until Sunday evening, so no journal posts until then. I hope to keep up this good week though!

Day 141

Having a lazy day today. I've been hungry all day too and someone needs to get to the grocery store!

Breakfast - Tried having oatmeal (made with milk, instead of water) but it came out so dry, I only had a couple of bites.

Snack - Banana

Lunch - Earlier I had about 1/2 a cup of yacamein noodles with soy sauce. And then later grilled chicken patty with some (1 tblsp) cesar dressing

Snack - 1 cadbury dark chocolate thin

Supper - Not too sure yet.

The good - I don't know. I ate the entire chicken patty I had for lunch in 15 minutes and I didn't feel overly full or anything. Scary!

The bad - A BANANA HAS 28G OF CARBS? WHAAAAAAT?

Yesterday I took an hour and 20 minute walk! I dragged the dog along and it was actually very nice. We went all the way up by the bike path and came all the way back, stopping a few times to admire the scenery! I was in a horrible mood when I got home yesterday so this was my way to chill. I'm going to try and get out for another walk today. I babysit later and have mountains upon mountains of homework and catching up to do. I'll be out of town Friday through the weekend too.

Day 140

20 weeks in and here is what I ate:

Breakfast - Nothing. I was running late, grabbed yogurt and left it in the car on my way to class. Needless to say I would have died eating it 6hrs later.

Snack - Grande SF non-fat caramel latte from Starbucks

Lunch - 1 slice white bread (gah!), 1 tblsp mayo (full fat, gah!), 2 eggs, 1 slice mozzarella, 1 slice salami.

Snack - South beach peanut butter/chocolate protein bar

Supper - No idea yet

The good - I'm eating in a more predictable pattern. As opposed to just randomly snacking throughout the day.

The bad - My horrible planning skills. I was hoping to have oatmeal for breakfast but there was just no time. I'm not doing very good on protein so far, I've counted just under 30g :(

I didn't get the chance to walk the dog last night, the paper I had to write took way longer than I expected. Tonight should go more smoothly so hopefully I can do that later.

On the weight-loss front, this week's loss was of 2.4. Bringing my total up to 77.6!

Day 139

So I've had a much better day today. I have tons and tons of homework to do so this will be a fast entry.

Breakfast - 1/2 SF Carnation instant breakfast with 1% milk

Snack - South Beach Diet oatmeal chip cookie pack, 3/4 small SF vanilla latte

Late lunch/Supper - 1/2 veggie burger, 1 onion slice, 1 pickle, 1 slice of mozzarella, 1 tsp. ketchup, 1 tsp. mustard. with 1/4 cup of white rice.

Snack - Not sure what I will be eating tonight, I'm going to the coffee shop later to study, so I may end up having a latte. I need some fruits in me too.

The good - No mindless eating, made an effort to have something breakfast. I also parked faaaaaaar from school so had a good walk there and back. I will also try and walk the dog tonight. I've also done pretty good with my water today.

The bad - I didn't have lunch/real food until 5pm when I got home from school, so I was starving. Also, the white rice I could have avoided, but I had less than I would have had yesterday which is good.

Weigh-in tomorrow!!!!!!!!

Day 138

I have a lot to say tonight, so I better get crackin'.

When I made the decision (back in January!) to start blogging about my journey it was so that I could keep myself accountable. Well folks, I feel like I haven't been honest lately, so here it goes. I've been feeling crappy, physically and emotionally. It's just been really tough for some reason. I'm blaming my hormones, and my eating habits as of late. It's hard to put into words. I guess you could say I've taken my weight loss for granted. I've had it really easy so I've just been floating around, mindlessly for the past few weeks. It's almost like I've lost my identity. I used to hide behind my weight and I was very 'comfortable' doing that apparently. I feel down and I feel incredibly guilty about feeling down. I'm starting to think that it's this guilt I've been feeling that has been sabotaging me in a way.

That was a lot of rambling but I realized a lot today at support group. I definitely have issues I need to work through. That's what this surgery is about, right? Such an emotional roller-coaster. I will get past this though!

At support group today, Jean-Loup Sylvestre (nurse coordinator of the bariatric clinic) came and talked about the "golden rules" of gastric bypass. Most of them were no-brainers (ie no drinking with food, exercise, proteinproteinprotein etc) but one rule which was different was the snacking rule. I was always been told to have 3 meals, and 2-3 snacks. The first few months were easy, there was no way I could have had all those snacks. Now on the other hand, I feel hungry a lot more of the time and I've been counting on those snacks to get me through certain days. Lately I've been snacking on crap not because I've been hungry, just because I've felt I had to be eating more. Anyhoo, apparently my clinic is now telling patients not to snack, unless we're starving of course. That changes things a bit, I don't know if I could go a day without snacking. This week will be a test.

This week will be different from other weeks.

• Journaling every BLT (bite, lick, taste)
• Exercise, just move whenever I can. I've gotten into a nasty habit of plotting my butt on the couch and not moving at inch.
• No more sweets. Yesterday I had a biscotti. Well, 2 halves, about 5hrs apart. I've been pushing my sugar boundaries way too much. It has to stop.
• Less carbs. My pouch can tolerate bread again which is a mixed blessing.
• Diet coke. Enough said.

That's my plan for the week :)

Day 137

Well readers, I have no updates for you really. Same old, same old. The infection is completely cleared up (yay!), and my eating this week can be summed up in one word: horrendous.
I need to find some new inspiration because this all is getting out of hand. I did go through my pantry and dug up up things I had bought during my last shopping spree in the States. Hopefully that will help me through this week. I'm also going to go to the Running Room tomorrow and see what they can tell me about real running shoes. My shoes just aren't supporting my feet/ankles like I think they should, making running kind of awkward for the moment. Speaking of running, I neeeeeed to get it going again.

That's it for a blah Saturday, I need a push!

Day 134

It's day 134 and I am happy to report that I am feeling better. The antibiotics are still making me nauseous, the morning pill is the worst, but at least I get to go to bed after the nightly one.

Nothing much else to report, I'm trying to get in some water, I've slacked off in that department lately. Here's my updated chart:

Day 132

Well folks, I'm having troubles! This is one of those embarrassing TMI entries, so brace yourselves.
Late last week I started having UTI symptoms. It wasn't so bad and I knew I had a doctor appointment this morning so I toughed it out through the weekend. I actually woke up during the night from the pain/discomfort, I told all this to my doctor and of course she figured out right away what it was. She gave me a prescription for Macrobid, which I've taken in the past with no complications or side effects.
Anyhoo, I was to take them with food, which I did. Within 20 minutes of having breakfast, I started feeling nauseous. I was about to leave for class so I tried not to let it get to me, but after a while, I just couldn't take it anymore. I tried throwing up and nothing was coming up, it was just dry heaves. I felt really tired after that whole ordeal so I went to bed and slept for 4hrs.

I'll try the 2nd pill tonight, see how it goes. Hopefully it was a fluke and I can get rid of this infection.

Day 130

I. Hate. Eggs.

Explanation? I took my brothers out for brunch this morning, figure I'd order a small plate which had 2 eggs, bacon, potatoes. Now maybe I ate too fast, or maybe it was just the eggs but holy cow I thought I was going to die right there in the restaurant. I've only had eggs maybe 3 or 4 times but each time something different has happened. I held it in the whole ride home and I guess I did a good job of it, I couldn't even throw it up when I got home. Yucky! I do feel much better now, but that was weird and hasn't happened in weeks!

Today is officially 'job hunting' day. I need a job, and I need it soon!

Day 128: A picture worth one thousand words...

It didn't come out very clearly and I had to crop out my scale because I didn't realise how dirty it was! But I made it to Onderland yesterday officially, just 1 day after I had planned to. VERY EXCITED!

School is kicking my butt, I've just been so tired and work is piling up already. Crazy! Eating is definitely proving to be a challenge. Today and yesterday I've been able to come home and make a salad (with protein) to take the edge off until supper. I've also gotten into a bad habit of eating my mom's banana-chocolate mini muffins. I had 2 last night (over the course of 2 or so hours) and then another this morning. At least I can somewhat stop myself.

Here are some hair pictures, I didn't have that much to choose from, hope these are detailed enough!

Day 126

Just leaving for my first day of school....just updating my week 18 weigh-in. My scale is torturing me: 200.8! I did a lot better this month than I expected. I didn't meet my goal of getting to Onderland by September 4th, but I came pretty darn close, so I'm happy! This week's loss also brings my total to 72 lbs exactly.

That's all for today :)

ps. Amber I'll try and take some better pictures for you!

Day 124: I'm baaaaaaaack

Ouf, I made it through my first post-op vacation in one piece! I have a bunch of unpacking to do, and I'm exhausted, but here are some highlights:

• It was the most comfortable flight ever. I actually had like 7" of extra belt left, when in the past, I had to squeeze on the most I had. I could cross my legs on the plane. I could go to the bathroom without the other passengers getting out of their seats. I could fit in the airplane bathroom, comfortably.
• I could walk without having asthma attacks. I could get up and down the stairs in the subway without a problem.
• I bought some shirts and pants in large!

And now...here is what I ate, well, 5 meals, the rest can't be added right now:

1.
2.
3.
4.
5.

1. We went to this panini place, and I had a cheese panini, I ate maybe less than half, it was really good though.

2. We were too tired to leave the hotel, so we bought some veggies and dip, with cheese and crackers for supper.

3. Broadway Deli...had 1 potato piece with lots, and lots, and lots of fruit. It kept me full the entire day.

4. Tao...oh my gosh it was so nice! I ordered the Pad Thai noodles with chicken. Not the best of choices just because the more I ate, the more I seemed to have in my plate. I took the rest home but never touched it.

5. Dos Caminos SoHo...ate the refried beans, 3/4 of one taco and most of the chicken in the others.

6. Not pictured, but when we went to Hairspray, I ate 3 peanut m&m's.

Day 118

It's my last day here at my dad's office and tomorrow morning I leave for NYC! I can't wait to see how I manage eating out 3 meals a day for 5 days. Should be interesting.

Anyhoo, adieu for now, update to come on Saturday!

Day 117: Photo-Op

Another crappy weather Sunday here in Loserville. Last night we had a big birthday bash for my dad's aunt's 70th. It was fun to see some extended relatives we don't see very often. Some hadn't seen me ever...only my dad when he was a kid! It was also nice to see some closer relatives whom haven't seen me since Christmas. I got compliments by the dozens, very nice for the ego, I must say.
The restaurant was good, I had veal parmigiano which I hadn't had in months. It was so delicious, I had about half of a cutlet before feeling like I was going to blow up. It was good though...I didn't over-do it. I also had 1 small bite of the birthday cake, in fact, I have a giant pile of it sitting in my fridge as I type. I won't lie, I was looking for something to have for breakfast this morning...and I came across it. I opened it up, stared at it, and asked myself why I wanted it. I took a bit and put it in the back of the fridge, hopefully it'll be gone by the time I go back downstairs. It is situations like these which scare me the most. I know they'll be times where I want something for no reason, I won't always have the self-control to stop at one bite.

Anyhoo, here are the promised pics:



1. Me giving my brother a kiss
2. My dad, me, and my brother
3. My other brother, with coffee cream in his eyelids
4. I left my uncle my camera to find about 20 pictures he took of himself, this being one of them

Day 114

Just a quick update because I have nothing better to do. I went and treated myself to a pedicure today. It's been a stressful past couple of weeks for some reason and I had to release some of that. It felt great and now I have cute dressed up feet for New York. Other exciting news from today, I got a call from the audience coordinator at David Letterman and she had me call another woman to give me my trivia question. Thank goodness it was an easy one, we got the tickets! Next Wednesday, we start the day off at Good Morning America, and then we head over to tape the David Letterman show! It's all very exciting stuff. Last time I was in New York, we sat through 2 Ellen Degeneres shows (in the riff raff room). We even got to meet her, see Bill Clinton, BON JOVI, Denzel Washington, Regis Philbin, Nathan Lane. I'm the most starstruck person you'll ever meet so I'm looking really forward to going to all these tapings.
Anyhoo, I got a bunch of exercise today, walking up and down streets looking for this spa, and eating was kind of a pain today. I had 1 1/2 chicken tenders and I was full. I didn't want to push it, so that's all I had to eat until past 7pm. I've been a bad eater lately, don't know what's up.

Day 113

Another boring day at the office = New update. Yay!
Alright, so yesterday I hit week 16, just 2 weeks before I hoped to finally get to Onderland. Did week 15 go well? Of course it did. Did my scale behave? No! I think weighing-in less is playing with my mind more...because if I only weigh-in once a week, I expect bigger losses. It's a no-win situation really. I don't know what to do with that damn scale anymore.
I have 7.4 lbs to go until I hit Onderland, not sure if I can make it by September 4th, I seem to have broken my "3 good week, 1 not-so-good week" pattern so who knows. I'm upping my water intake because I didn't make an effort last week and I had a few nauseous days. My hair is coming out more than last week, but still way, way, way less than I expected it to *knocks on wood*. I just hope things continue to progress, I'm getting anxious.
My big New York City trip is next week and I know the rest of this week is going to fly by. Only 2 days left of work after today, we have a big family reunion thing on Saturday so it will be fun to show off to family I haven't seen in a while. And then I'm gone Tuesday-Saturday...school starts up again on the 4th.

Where oh where has summer gone?

Day I-don't-even-know-what-day-of-the-week-it-is

Sorry for my recent absence...BUT I AM DONE SUMMER SCHOOL!!!!!! These past few days have been hell. No sleep, barely any eating, lots of coffee/tea, not much water. That's university finals for ya. It's been rough but I believe I've done well considering. I'm just glad to have it over and done with. I didn't do as well as I wanted to, mostly due to the fact that I'm a horrible last-minute studying person. It always blows up in my face and I always tell myself that I won't let it happen again. We'll see once the grades turn up, hopefully before I go to NYC.
That's all for today, yesterday, and the day before that.

PS: I got an amazing haircut the other day. It's VERY short, so I'm hoping this will slow down any hair loss that has and might still occur. I'd post some pics but I still haven't found that stupid camera charger!

Day 105

It's the start of week 15, woohoo! I just realised that I never officially marked a weight for last week on here...so here is a slight update:

Aug 7th: -1.4, 214.7 lbs, total of 58.1 lbs
Aug 14th: -5.6, 209.1 lbs, total of...63.7 lbs in 15 weeks.

It gives me goosebumps I swear. So exciting. It's funny too because normally, it would be at this point where I'd get this fear of losing all my weight, lose track of my diet, and regain. Not this time though. I swear I'm so motivated to make this work.
I'm kind of stuck in a food rut and really needing some new recipes. I open my fridge in the morning to grab some for lunch and everything just seems so blah. I walked to the grocery store on my lunch and just walked up and down every aisle and nothing looked good, or healthy, or worth the effort of eating. Today I picked up a wild rice salad, but it wasn't too good. Now I'm eating grapes and I had about 3/4 of a sugar-free CIN for breakfast. As for supper, I'm meeting some cousins at a portugese restaurant. Should be interesting!

Gotta run, I still haven't found my camera charger, argh!

Day 104

Well another Monday in loser-land...

I weighed myself yesterday morning and am proud to say that I now have just over 9 lbs until Onderland! Woohooo! Food-wise the past couple of days have been good. We went to this really nice chinese restaurant on Saturday and knowing I have a weakness for chinese, I was terrified. I ended up ordering chicken skewers and holy cow...they were so good! I had about 1/3 of a spring roll (not imperial/fried), an entire chicken skewer (maybe 3-4oz), and some bites of my friends sweet & sour soup. I was so full, I had to spit out the last bite of chicken because I knew it would give me trouble if I swallowed. We walked around A LOT after supper just to get that brick feeling. It was such a good meal! I was very satisfied after, which is rare these days.
Last night I went to a friend's BBQ and had a couple of tiny chicken breasts marinated in this secret family recipe sauce. It was so good, very moist which seems to be key.

I tried taking pictures last night and they didn't come out too well, I'm going to have to try later. Plus I lost my camera battery charger. Oops!

I'll update tomorrow, 15wks!

****Day 100****

I have finally reached day 100 of my journey and I am doing just dandy.
I hit -60 lbs this morning, right on the money, 212.8! Just over 12 lbs to Onderland which is my next big mission. I don't even know what I'll do with myself when that day comes. I might have to be revived. I'm really hoping to make it there by the time school starts, Sept. 4th. We'll see...I'm not putting too much pressure on myself, I have just under 4 weeks to do it.
Eating is going okay, I hate eating, eating is a chore, most of the time. Other days I need my 3 meals and 3 snacks. Yesterday for example, I had breakfast, then fruits, lunch, then crackers, supper, and a SF pudding. Today, coffee for breakfast, 3 teaspoons of cereal for lunch and that's it for now. I have class later and I'll probably starve if I don't get some food in me by then. Argh!
On Tuesday I thought I was going to DIE. I went to Wendy's and got myself a chili for lunch, and a grilled chicken burger to eat on my way to class after work. It was just before 5pm and I started eating the chicken from my burger...2 bites in I started feeling some pains, then the super-foamies came. I knew I had to throw up, but of course they were fixing the bathrooms at work...so I rushed home trying to hold it in and about 1/2 a block from my house, I had to throw up on the sidewalk. It was lovely.
My hair has also started coming out faster than ever, it isn't so horrific yet, hopefully it will stay like this. I've been keeping my eye on my hair brush...I keep hoping that i'll be spared the worst of it.

Anyhoo, that's all for day 100!

Day 97!

Long time no update, it feels weird not to be able to update almost every day.
I had a pretty good weekend. Job interview on Saturday, I'm not very confident that I got the job, but I should be hearing back from them by Wednesday. Fingers crossed!
After the interview I went to Addition-Elle (the store I used to work at) because they were having a 50% off every sale. I went for bras, because mine are all way too big now, but ended up with a cart full of clothes. A lot of stuff was nice, but everything I liked wasn't included in the sale. Figures! I ended up getting some really nice denim bermuda-type shorts, size 16 of course. I used to wear a 22-24 there! Incredible. Besides that I also got a nice white t-shirt, with some detail under the bust. All in all I spent just under $30. Not bad for an cute outfit I can prance around the streets of NYC in.
Yesterday we decided to get out of the city and go to the beach. The weather was so beautiful, totally worth the hour drive and 45 minutes in traffic. The bathing suit I bought in June is way too big in the bust, I need to have the straps shortened or something, I kept having to pull my girls up. All we did was lay on the sand and sleep...so relaxing. I got back late in the afternoon, met my grandparents and their friends from California...and we had a nice dinner outside. I of course was dead from being in the sun all day, I went up to bed just before 9 and passed out the second my head hit the pillows. At least I'm nice and refreshed today.

14 weeks out tomorrow!

Day 93

Another quick update on me.
I've had a weird hungry day today. I eat, and then an hour later, I feel like I could eat again. I didn't do very well on protein today...I'm trying to add more fruits/veggies in my diet. Last night and for lunch today I made a delicious salad with baby spinach, feta cheese, cherry tomatoes, cucumber, and my sugar-free dijon dressing. I guess that could be the reason I've been getting hungrier faster, not much protein.
Support-group meeting last night was fun, amazing how different people look from month-to-month. We talked a lot about grazing and I think I'm more confused than even. I've been trying really hard not to eat between my 3 meals, I mean if I need to, I have a snack in the afternoon...but I'm trying to avoid the BLT's as we called them at Weight Watchers, bites, licks, and tastes. I guess the best thing to do would be to visit a nutritionist. Every one's meal plans are so different!
What else...I tried going for a bike ride tonight and my butt hurt so bad from Tuesday, I couldn't even sit down. I'm contemplating returning the bike I got actually...I think the frame is a bit too big for me, and I don't think the seat should be hurting as much as it is. We'll see I guess.

Besides that next week I have a bunch of class revisions to prepare for finals which are the week after that. Stressful times I tell ya, so I don't know how often I'll be around in the coming weeks.

Day 9 Part II

I couldn't get my bike last night, so I picked it up tonight after class. They didn't have the sale one anymore...so I sort of had to settle for the cheap one, which isn't really a problem, sort of. The seat hurt my butt big time, even with the gel seat. I didn't last as long as I thought I would, 30mins tops. We'll see, baby steps!

Eating-wise, all I had tonight was a small greek salad, I've caught myself munching/grazing a lot today, I don't even realise I'm doing it until I've already stuck something in my mouth. Like tonight I'm hungry, I'm debating whether or not to have a bowl of cereal this late.

Here is this week's chart, not sure i'll be able to update tomorrow, I have my support group and then meeting friends for coffee.